How Bias Distorts Reality

The above video interview with

Egberto Willies

on his show, Egerberto Off the Record, was inspired by my piece, Bias By Us: How Not Knowing That We Don’t Know Creates Known Harm. The content below is simply to add some perspective for your journey to live as a liberated human.

Everyday I realize how robbed so many of us have been. For so long, I was so distracted by infinite beauty that I couldn’t really see the suffering in the way that many of us do. That was until I put on some glasses that were not my own and saw the distortions that inform how many of us live. That statement will make more sense when you read below.

Now that I truly see and have felt how we have been able to get so confused by the constant barrage of messaging telling us that we are not enough and unworthy of Love, I’m trying to be of service to those who find this unacceptable. Many of us know in our hearts that anything that tells us or others that we are less than the offspring of Eternal and Ever Expressing Love is lying. However, we do not have the practice of walking in our knowing.

My vision is that one day we will celebrate communities that encourage all beings seeing themselves and others as the unrepeatable, incomparable, magnificent evolutionary events that we are. Because when you see yourself as you are, you will truly be able to see people as they can be. And Love will tell you where to go from there.

The World As It Is

One time my dad called me and told me to talk to my little sister because she seemed to be following a crowd that my dad didn’t think was in her best interest. Since I was a Mr. Goody Two Shoes Church Boy Book Nerd, my dad thought I could talk some sense into her.

A couple of days later my dad called and said I made everything far worse. He then said that he never wanted me to give my sister advice again. He also let me know that he told my older sister to not let her daughters talk to me either.

So, what was the horrible advice I gave to my little sister? Well the exact sentiments of my words were the same advice I give to my daughters now. “You are your own person. Get to know who you are apart from the crowd. If you realize you are a person with good intentions and wants the best for yorself and others, be a leader. We don’t have enough good ones. If you realize that people follow you into your mess, stop. It will come back to haunt you. Get a mentor to help you use your influence responsibly. If you realize you have a habit of following the crowd, follow a crowd that’s going where you want to go. Because at the end of the day you are responsible for you, whether your life is awesome or whether it sucks. It’s on you. So get to know who you are. You are the only you there is. Don’t waste this experience trying to be someone else.”

My dad was pissed by this because he wanted my sister to be who he wanted her to be—not her “own person”. Just like he didn’t want me to be my own person. But, because the person I was being didn’t get into trouble, he thought I would be someone that told my sister not to get in trouble. I knew my sister enough to know that she was probably leading the kids who were getting in trouble. So, I just offered her choices on how to be a responsible leader or a responsible follower. What she got out of it was to tell my dad that she was her own person and didn’t have to be who he wanted her to be. That choice was her bias at work.

Why am I telling you this and what does it really have to do with bias?

Well, like I ended up telling my dad when he blamed me for my sisters behavior for the rest of his life, “If I give someone a white rose, but they are wearing red glasses, they will see a red rose. I am responsible for what I give; not for what someone chooses to receive.”

There is a world that is what it is. And then based on our biases, there is a world that “appears to be”. My work is to first, help peopl erealize that they are wearing glasses. Second to help them know that they have an option to take then off to see if they are of a service to them or if they are blinding them to some aspects of being able to see themselves, others, and the world more clearly.

If you ever put on glasses that are not meant for you, you know that it will distort what you see. Putting on someone else’s biases works in the same way. Everything I create is to invite us into clearer seeing starting with ourselves. Because you too are your own person. If you can’t see that, then maybe you a wearing glasses/living with biases that don’t serve who you are or who you can be, and how you can do your part to usher the world into its greater potential.